I am here

I want to tell you a story, to have you rapt and focused upon my every word.
I want to see you leaning in as I weave the details and spin the plot as something tangible.
I want to know that I am reaching you with my words, that I am impacting you in a way that will last.
I want to teach you my story. I want you to see what I have seen.
I want to teach you so that you don't have to learn the hard way.
I want to join the words and diction in a way that holds you mesmerized within my ability to speak.
I want to learn how to tell you in words that you will understand.
I want you to listen when I speak, and value that which I tell you.

I am here.

I always listen. I'm always ready to be whatever you need me to be.
There may be times when I would wish to be anywhere else.
But for you I will remain, and you will never know of my reticence.
I am dedicated. I am honest. I am transparent.
Ah but therein lies the complication.
I hurt. I bleed. I suffer.
You must earn the right to be a part of my hidden unhappiness.
I will share my entire life and soul with you.
But you truly know me when I show you my scars and my wounds.

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Let me be here for you.
I see your pain.
I see the emptiness in your eyes.
I see the way you glance at people out of the corner of your eye to see if they are watching you and to see if they are staying consistent.
I see the hunger for fulfillment and love.
I know how your heart aches with every beat.
I know how your head begins to spin and you feel empty and broken every time you think about the future.
I know.
I understand.
But I don't know how to help you.
If you let me in. I will pour out this love that I have and I will lend you solace in your pain.
There have been times when you look at me and I see you begging me to say something, and all I am able to do is hug you and tell you that I do, honestly love you, and that God is shaping this part of your life so that you will have a better ministry in the future.
But most of the time your eyes just fall and you turn away.
I offer.
I wait.
I pray.
I am here.

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Dear God show me how to use these few talents I have to help this hurting child. My heart aches with the pain I know they feel. Dear God grant me Your wisdom so that I may help them to yield their broken vessel to you for healing.
Use me.
Pour me out and cast me aside.
But do not let this one fall away.